Over the weekend I was at the shops purchasing a few items for the house and my self. When shopping for clothes I look for the discounted items usually pilled up on some table or hanging separately with a large sign above it advertising how good a deal it is. Unfortunately it is rarely a good deal mostly because the people before me have already ransacked all the good stuff, but the most annoying reason is that usually the only sizes on the racks are XXL and up. Being vertically challenged and without winter-warming deposits in my body, the items would sit on me as a disflated parachute.
It has become a common occurrence that when I see items I like, and the price is right, there is nothing in size.
Well last weekend the tables have turned, at least in this one instance. A rack of winter jackets was being modelled in front of a particular mans clothing stores. With cautious optimism I flicked through the jackets to discover to my delight that all the sizes were ‘small’ & ‘medium’. Within a heartbeat, I flashed my card at the store woman and the item became mine. As we were leaving the store, it came to my attention that a man whose stature and weight greatly exceeded mine was standing there, in front of the same rack that yielded me my gem. At that moment I experiences what people call schadenfreude. It’s a loanword from German (due to English language lacking a word for the feeling) that simply means pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others. The fact that the largest size available would rip-apart on the man as when Bruce Banner transformed into the hulk, brought great joy to me. Finally someone knows how I feel.